... remember beauty is found within."
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| Within the mouth you mean?? |
I've been thinking quite a lot lately (well, that's something I do way too much) about beauty, what it meant, what it implied to be writing a blog about it, spending money in it and such. Many things concurred to feed my thoughts. First, many discussions with Minnie about what it is to be beautiful and the pressure we're under in this country (=France) about that. It might not be obvious to the rest of the world, but the reputation of French women to be pretty and classy comes at a very high price. I don't think any other countries is as obsessed with thinness and perfection as we are here (and I've lived in other countries).
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| Cyrano or my favourite French Lover (as played by JP Belmondo, I don't like Depardieu :p ) |
Six months ago, there was a huge scandal about a cardiac medication that was prescribed to women for losing weight and resulted in severe illnesses and even deaths. It was all over the news, and yet yesterday, I heard on the radio that another treatment (this time an anti-epileptic one, once again hardly some innocuous pill) was being praised all over the internet on forums and such because it help reduce hunger and lose weight. All this in the country that has the lowest average BMI in Europe. More than 70% of French women consider themselves overweight and if you ever have the time, go and look at the French online catalogs of clothing or lingerie brands such as Etam, Morgan or Jennyfer, and you'll probably be shocked at how thin the models are. As someone who had issues with her weight all her life (due to family and health issues), I can tell you that it's very very hard on a daily basis. I read once about a sociological experience that showed people two pictures of a woman in a suit eating a sandwich in her lunchbreak. One was thin and the other was curvy. The overall comment for the thin woman was "she's a very busy working woman who has no time for lunch, she's probably a great achiever", while the comment for the curvy woman was "well, it's not by eating junk that she'll solve her problem".
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| The dinner scene in Cocteau's Beauty and the Beast, by far the most beautiful adaptation of the tale that was ever done |
I long thought that I was feeling that because I had always been curvy, but I found out not long ago that my mother, who had at BMI at 19,5 when she was 20 and has now reached a horrid 22,5 at 64 after two children, felt that pressure as well...
The second stream of thought was an online article I read last week about beauty magazines: it was written by two guys who had taken a look at their girlfriends' magazines while on holidays and were appalled at what said magazines portrayed as "women". In their own words, the modern occidental woman is: nymphomaniac, superficial and first a foremost a huge consumer because anything that can make her pretty and happy is on sale somewhere...
I confess to reading one beauty mag regularly, Cosmopolitan, because my mother offered me a subscription years ago (it was my break from PhD readings) and I never stopped it, and while there are things I like about it, I've been more and more disappointed by its content lately. But all the same, I like to read beauty blogs in general (though I ready nail blogs in majority), and I like taking care of myself, having nice products in my bathroom, feeling pretty and good and killing the stereotype that brainy girls are ugly and unkempt. Does this mean that I am as those magazines describe? I do not take any particular "pride" in my university degrees, I just had the luck to do what I liked doing, but I think they shield me from the "superficial" flaw. Having been single for four years now, I hardly categorize myself as nymphomaniac and the very limited income provided by my starting independent business does not allow me to be a huge consumer. And yet, I do put a good part of my budget in beauty, first and foremost in polish, so??...
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| I do not think I'll ever the courage to watch that movie again... |
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The third train of thought was inspired both by my catching up with reading the "blogs of the Triad" and a tribute I've seen on a couple of blogs this week about Sophie Lancaster. First, the Triad. It's the nickname I gave to three bloggers whose names I've seen pop here and there, and while I started to follow one of them (Nihrida) quite some time ago now, I only recently fell into regularly reading the other two (Evil Angel from Black nail polish and lipgloss and Feline from Alizarine Claws). It's really no surprise that those three are friends, and no surprise either that I feel a like-mindedness with them, and find both their mentality and appearance beautiful, though many-coloured hair, piercings or snake jewellery are rather unusual. I already told you that I was both a Medieval geek and a metalhead, so while I seldom dress "metal" or "goth" (hard to do when you're over 30 and have to meet clients for business), I recognize myself in that universe, and I always add a piece of unusual jewellery or an accessory to a classic outfit (I'm quite a customer from Alchemy Gothic jewellery!!). All this to say that "beauty with an edge" is my kind of beauty and I'm way more scared by "clone girls" who dress just like fashion adds than by a guy all dressed in black with make-up!
So of course, I had to be especially sensitive to the story of Sophie Lancaster, though hopefully anyone is, no matter what culture or subculture they belong to. I've seen several posts about it, I remember Scrangie's, but I think this one is the best sum-up:
SOPHIE.
I know it's already been a very long post, but it's a very sensitive issue for me and I'm a very wordy girl... So what is Beauty? Yes, true, long-lasting and enriching beauty is found within (all the pictures in this post were my hero-figures ever since I was a little girl), but does it mean that you can't take care of the outside as well? Does taking care of the outside mean you have to fall into consumerism and the diktats of the cosmetic and fashion world?
In the end, I think Beauty is Courage. Courage to look at yourself, get to know yourself, find out who you are and then assuming it, thus showing to the world that what you are is indeed beautiful, even if it's not their taste. If you are not afraid of yourself, you won't be afraid of others and won't hate them for looking different, leading to such tragedies as Sophie's story. And if in the end, you find out that you want to be thin or have the same haircut as this or that celebrity, as long as it is your choice, great. I think the problem is not the goal in itself, but the reasons behind it: our family values, the ideas and images we've been brought up with, the society we live, etc, etc, etc... they're all parasites to our visions and ideas, parasites we have to get aware of so as to decide if we choose them voluntarily instead of letting them guide us.
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| I hesitated between this picture or one from Hellboy, both being Ron Perlman in characters that I love, but I guess I had to go on with the Beauty and the Beast theme... |
Yes I know a woman can be beautiful and happy with my size and weight, and I do find myself beautiful most of the time, but due to circumstances in my life, my history with my family and such, I will feel more myself after losing some more weight. I could make a long list but I hope you got my point: there's beauty in everyone, and using some artifices to bring it to light is not shameful, as long as you see it this way (tools to reveal beauty) and not the other away around (necessary means to create beauty when there's none because I don't fit into such and such criteria).
Once again, sorry for the long post I hope I didn't bore you to death, and I promise I'll be back soon with pretty frivolous things!!
